Two weeks ago Emily & I were enjoying our day off when Max came by the apartment to ask for our help with something. An orphanage up the hill, twenty minutes from where we are staying, has ten children between the ages of 3 and 6 years old with two nannies living there. Unfortunately both nannies had malaria and needed some time off to rest and recuperate. “Would you be willing to help out by taking care of the children for a couple of weeks?” Of course! Within an hour we were packed up and had arrived at our new home, Havilah Village, started by Global Vessels (a non-profit out of DC). The long term plan is to have 10 of these households situated here, two others are built and another group of children is expected to arrive in the next month or so. The ten children spoke no English and Emily & I, as much as we have been trying, still know very little Kiswahili. This was going to be great.
Fortunately for us the children were relatively well behaved and were patient with us as they tried to explain what they needed, what part of their body was currently hurting and in need of attention, who took what from whom, etc. And on top of trying to give love and attention to these children who only three months ago came to live at the house, we were also figuring out how to cook, clean, do laundry, teach in the “activity room”, and maintain our sanity. They were long days, and sometimes long nights comforting sick or simply sad children who were missing their parents or relatives (we didn’t always know).
Emily & I quickly fell in love with these children. Karen, age 6, is one of the hardest workers I’ve ever seen. She would get upset with us for not letting her do the dishes, cook, bathe the other children and mop the floors (which apparently the nannies have her doing every day). Dorcas, age 6, loves to dance and make up stories that we don’t understand. Her little sister Jacqueline, age 3, is beautiful and playful when happy, but cried often when she was not held and whenever it was time for bed. Victoria, age 4, was shy and smiled a lot when she was happy, but was also depressed and cried quite a bit while we were there, perhaps sad because she was missing her family or because she was not sure why her nannies were gone and we where there. We were told she and her sister were very thin and had been treated very badly when they arrived 3 months earlier. Her twin sister, Vivian, the monkey, is a bouncing, jumping, climbing, excitable child who we sometimes thought was hard of hearing or simply in her own world. Veronica, age 4, our flower child, craves love and attention, but is not the sharpest tool in the shed. Eric, age 6, is the oldest boy, always wanted to help out, but hadn’t been exposed to the amount of chores Karen and Dorcas had simple because he was a boy and culturally boys don’t help with the housework. Abdu Rahi, age 4, usually had a smile on his face and was in a good mode. He loved games and was very sly about hitting or taking things from the other kids, only doing it when we didn’t see and always with a smile on his face. Yasini, age 3, is a cute kid who frustratingly would cry sometimes, but not tell us what the issue was. Usually it was something as simple as he wanted to sleep in the top bunk rather than the bottom. Enoch, age 3, was not bothered by the fact that we did not understand what he was saying. He would talk and talk, repeating things over and over to us without getting frustrated. He also habitually wore his sandals on the wrong feet.
(Emily)
It seems that we keep having experiences that we claim will be the ‘best’ or ‘most memorable’ part of our trip. Right now I am saying that our stay at Havilah Village is sure to be on the top of that list. Two weeks seems like such a short time, but for some reason it feels like we have spent months there…with our ten kids.
Setting:
As much as we are in love with the kids, we are in love with the setting of this village. We are out in a rural village that is situated on a small hilltop. The air is much cooler and from our front porch we can look out over the bush and see Mt. Kilimanjaro! Behind us is the second tallest peak in Tanzania, Mt. Meru. We are also just outside the gates of the National Park where we took our first safari game drive.
Domestic Labor?:
Before we left on this trip I had mentioned that I was actually feeling the need to become more domestic, to really know what it means to have to work in order to meet basic needs. The American household has become relatively easy to run with its washing machines, dishwashers, and mops heads that actually stay attached to the stick. Man did I get what I asked for! I found myself constantly thinking of my Grandmothers, both put a lot of hard work into raising their 7 and 9 children, both passed away this last year. As I was de-boning a whole chicken (Ned removed the head and feet), hanging the laundry out to dry, or moping the floors daily I often wondered if I could ‘hang’ with my Grandma Brock out on the farm. Do I have what it takes to work as hard as she did, not just for two weeks but day after day, year after year? Am I capable of standing in the kitchen all day long in order to prepare just one meal? Would I ever be able to find joy in domestic labor? Did she enjoy it, or did she spend her day wishing that she had a house girl to do the work while she went to the Whitman Hotel for lunch? One afternoon while Karen and I were washing our 10 plates, 10 cups, and 10 lunch forks Ned overheard the little boys playing outside and saying something ridiculously funny; we laughed so hard that I started crying and the 6 year old was looking at me like ‘can you pull it together- we have a job to do here.’ I realized that yes- there is a lot of joy to be had at home working away with your little family. We were working hard and having fun. I am lucky b/c I am pretty sure that neither of my Grandmothers had their husbands alongside to do half of the work!
Karen:
Karen is the 6 year old that Ned described as a hard worker. She really put me to shame as she instructed me on the proper way to really scrub all of those children in the bath, and then thoroughly scrub tub between each bath… I am pretty sure I would have just filled the tub back up with water. She would give my cousin Jessica or even Aunt Sheri a run for their money in the hard worker department. She is the one who took to us the most and it was really hard on her when we told her we were leaving. She spent the morning crying, which is something she had not done once during our visit. She had been staying with her Grandmother who taught her how to READ, how to speak a little English, and how to do simple math. But since moving into this house with these nannies she had not been given a book or toy; they have been treating her as their own little house girl. We are pretty certain she does all the dishes, scrubs all the floors, washes everyone’s house slippers everyday, etc. One night at dinner she waved for my attention and I realized that she was actually choking on her food. Panic, Oh my God, what do you do. I was already hitting her on the back when I realized that was the wrong thing to do and that she needed the Heimlich. At that very instant the power went out, as it does most nights. Charming; now we are in the pitch black, all the other children are excitedly screaming about the lights, Karen, or something else, and I am trying to get her out of her chair and find that one spot on her body. We managed to complete the task, the lights came back on, and there were only a few tears. Her tears, not mine, although I really felt like I wanted to cry!
Nannies:
I could go on and on about the nannies, but the short story is that they are stealing from the children’s home. They think they have hit the jackpot because these wealthy Americans have set up this home for the kids but have no idea how much things here really cost. Until now they have been left to determine what and how much food the children need each week. But after just two weeks we have realized that they are taking Global Vessels for 3 times what they actually need and handing the rest of the money and food out to their family and friends back at home. The sad part is that this is VERY common here and it is virtually impossible to hire a local that can be trusted not to cheat, even if it is just a little. We are pretty upset about it. If there is extra money it should be going to the children’s school tuition. We are going to suggest to this organization that we stay there, do the grocery shopping for them and keep the nannies from handling any of the money at all. The need for some sort of supervisor will be even greater as the other houses come on line and fill up with children, so we are really excited about the prospect of getting more involved.
Fortunately for us the children were relatively well behaved and were patient with us as they tried to explain what they needed, what part of their body was currently hurting and in need of attention, who took what from whom, etc. And on top of trying to give love and attention to these children who only three months ago came to live at the house, we were also figuring out how to cook, clean, do laundry, teach in the “activity room”, and maintain our sanity. They were long days, and sometimes long nights comforting sick or simply sad children who were missing their parents or relatives (we didn’t always know).
Emily & I quickly fell in love with these children. Karen, age 6, is one of the hardest workers I’ve ever seen. She would get upset with us for not letting her do the dishes, cook, bathe the other children and mop the floors (which apparently the nannies have her doing every day). Dorcas, age 6, loves to dance and make up stories that we don’t understand. Her little sister Jacqueline, age 3, is beautiful and playful when happy, but cried often when she was not held and whenever it was time for bed. Victoria, age 4, was shy and smiled a lot when she was happy, but was also depressed and cried quite a bit while we were there, perhaps sad because she was missing her family or because she was not sure why her nannies were gone and we where there. We were told she and her sister were very thin and had been treated very badly when they arrived 3 months earlier. Her twin sister, Vivian, the monkey, is a bouncing, jumping, climbing, excitable child who we sometimes thought was hard of hearing or simply in her own world. Veronica, age 4, our flower child, craves love and attention, but is not the sharpest tool in the shed. Eric, age 6, is the oldest boy, always wanted to help out, but hadn’t been exposed to the amount of chores Karen and Dorcas had simple because he was a boy and culturally boys don’t help with the housework. Abdu Rahi, age 4, usually had a smile on his face and was in a good mode. He loved games and was very sly about hitting or taking things from the other kids, only doing it when we didn’t see and always with a smile on his face. Yasini, age 3, is a cute kid who frustratingly would cry sometimes, but not tell us what the issue was. Usually it was something as simple as he wanted to sleep in the top bunk rather than the bottom. Enoch, age 3, was not bothered by the fact that we did not understand what he was saying. He would talk and talk, repeating things over and over to us without getting frustrated. He also habitually wore his sandals on the wrong feet.
(Emily)
It seems that we keep having experiences that we claim will be the ‘best’ or ‘most memorable’ part of our trip. Right now I am saying that our stay at Havilah Village is sure to be on the top of that list. Two weeks seems like such a short time, but for some reason it feels like we have spent months there…with our ten kids.
Setting:
As much as we are in love with the kids, we are in love with the setting of this village. We are out in a rural village that is situated on a small hilltop. The air is much cooler and from our front porch we can look out over the bush and see Mt. Kilimanjaro! Behind us is the second tallest peak in Tanzania, Mt. Meru. We are also just outside the gates of the National Park where we took our first safari game drive.
Domestic Labor?:
Before we left on this trip I had mentioned that I was actually feeling the need to become more domestic, to really know what it means to have to work in order to meet basic needs. The American household has become relatively easy to run with its washing machines, dishwashers, and mops heads that actually stay attached to the stick. Man did I get what I asked for! I found myself constantly thinking of my Grandmothers, both put a lot of hard work into raising their 7 and 9 children, both passed away this last year. As I was de-boning a whole chicken (Ned removed the head and feet), hanging the laundry out to dry, or moping the floors daily I often wondered if I could ‘hang’ with my Grandma Brock out on the farm. Do I have what it takes to work as hard as she did, not just for two weeks but day after day, year after year? Am I capable of standing in the kitchen all day long in order to prepare just one meal? Would I ever be able to find joy in domestic labor? Did she enjoy it, or did she spend her day wishing that she had a house girl to do the work while she went to the Whitman Hotel for lunch? One afternoon while Karen and I were washing our 10 plates, 10 cups, and 10 lunch forks Ned overheard the little boys playing outside and saying something ridiculously funny; we laughed so hard that I started crying and the 6 year old was looking at me like ‘can you pull it together- we have a job to do here.’ I realized that yes- there is a lot of joy to be had at home working away with your little family. We were working hard and having fun. I am lucky b/c I am pretty sure that neither of my Grandmothers had their husbands alongside to do half of the work!
Karen:
Karen is the 6 year old that Ned described as a hard worker. She really put me to shame as she instructed me on the proper way to really scrub all of those children in the bath, and then thoroughly scrub tub between each bath… I am pretty sure I would have just filled the tub back up with water. She would give my cousin Jessica or even Aunt Sheri a run for their money in the hard worker department. She is the one who took to us the most and it was really hard on her when we told her we were leaving. She spent the morning crying, which is something she had not done once during our visit. She had been staying with her Grandmother who taught her how to READ, how to speak a little English, and how to do simple math. But since moving into this house with these nannies she had not been given a book or toy; they have been treating her as their own little house girl. We are pretty certain she does all the dishes, scrubs all the floors, washes everyone’s house slippers everyday, etc. One night at dinner she waved for my attention and I realized that she was actually choking on her food. Panic, Oh my God, what do you do. I was already hitting her on the back when I realized that was the wrong thing to do and that she needed the Heimlich. At that very instant the power went out, as it does most nights. Charming; now we are in the pitch black, all the other children are excitedly screaming about the lights, Karen, or something else, and I am trying to get her out of her chair and find that one spot on her body. We managed to complete the task, the lights came back on, and there were only a few tears. Her tears, not mine, although I really felt like I wanted to cry!
Nannies:
I could go on and on about the nannies, but the short story is that they are stealing from the children’s home. They think they have hit the jackpot because these wealthy Americans have set up this home for the kids but have no idea how much things here really cost. Until now they have been left to determine what and how much food the children need each week. But after just two weeks we have realized that they are taking Global Vessels for 3 times what they actually need and handing the rest of the money and food out to their family and friends back at home. The sad part is that this is VERY common here and it is virtually impossible to hire a local that can be trusted not to cheat, even if it is just a little. We are pretty upset about it. If there is extra money it should be going to the children’s school tuition. We are going to suggest to this organization that we stay there, do the grocery shopping for them and keep the nannies from handling any of the money at all. The need for some sort of supervisor will be even greater as the other houses come on line and fill up with children, so we are really excited about the prospect of getting more involved.
More on this later. For now we will say a belated Merry Christmas! Hope yours was good. Ours was wonderful!
